_don't bother trying to explain, angel

with the absence of anything fun to do in the house besides torturing ants with the gas stove lighter and miming stupid chinese programs on channel 8, i decided to look around and uncover the lost mystreries of my past! however in my adventure around my hdb flat i didnt find anything particularly interesting that belonged to me except a he-man toy and some embarrassing cd's. however i did find something that caught me horrified and dumbfounded. a series of VCD's belonging to my very own mother. and no they are not what you are thinking : porno. its even worse. exercise videos entitled "get that firm butt in half an hour" and "nancys exercise routine to get that body you deserve" and thats not all for nuderneath there lay....... oh it pains me to retell it..... a linedancing vcd!!!
i mean of all things. i really cannot imagine my mother in a cowgirl outfit blurting out "yeeehaw!" and dancing around in a pair of boots that jingle. shes over the age of 50 now and can hardly bend over. i mean isnt linedancing a bit ambitious. when confronted : "mother why do you have linedancing videos in the house?" she replied simply. "im thinking of taking it up". "like when? when your 70 and have double the amount of physical limitations?". okay so i didnt say that last line because i respect my mother to the max. i would even respect her if she called out to me and a bunch of friends while she was linedancing as we passed the nearby community centre. although i'd probably cut off all family ties with her. but im not going to make anymore fun of my mum because she has just made some sago pudding and it tastes better than good!
you know i really find it odd as i sit here blogging and then downloading numerous random songs by completely random people and then deleting them because they suck, when my A's is in two weeks. i dont even know what to do for GP already considering i always fail (refer to previous entry for reasons). they say i write too informally and i reply who wants to read something formal?? im not as boring as you miss lee. which reminds me she forced me to go for consultation today but i conveniently forgot. i havent been reading the papers for quite some time.. lets say what 18 years? i got an F for current affairs but in my testimonial mr rajoo pointed out : "james has a wide scope of current affairs and a range of issues at hand" or something like that.
ive also increased the font on the blog because either im loosing my eyesight or i just realised the words are fucking small. smaller than..... nevermind. which reminds me i havent got my letter of enlistment for NS. hey just cause im half ang moh doesnt mean you wankers need be delaying my enlistment to serve the (stupid) nation. i bet when i go into the army im going to get this question thrown at me a millions times : huh you must do ns meh?. ive already got it about half a million times already. but unlike majority of the male population i shall be recieving a desk job! HAHA! all you noobs shall be shitting in bushes and getting chaffes in unwanted places and blisters on your toes. wheareas i shall be in an air conditioned room with an X-box plugged into the television playing halo 2 with a fellow rash-fested individual. but i guess i'll miss the whole NS experience. hah but fuck it the experience sucks anyway so dont try and console yourselves! (especially jeremy). but i gotta admit being at a desk for 10 years of my life, im not so looking forward to being a desky for another 2 bloody years.
i dont even know why i keep up a blog. do i derive any sort of pleasure from writing meaningless entries that do not directly have any positive impact on someones life. furthermore i run the risk of being fined should i ever say something like "fuck the goverment" or "i hate ******* <-- minority group". so people why do we keep blogs? we all need counseling but cant afford one therefore we hop to www.blogger.com to get a free one who listens to all your problems! anyway i better be going before i say something like "kuan yew is a dick!" woops i guess i already did. i know i share the same birthday as him but still. imagine if he died i would get a holiday every year for the rest of my life. hahaha. touch wood ah!. woops no wood...