Wednesday, November 10, 2004
its 2.41am. ive just woken up from a pretty disturbing sleep. cant get good rest nowadays. technically i shouldnt be doing this but nightmares have made me think other wise. maybe its the hours of listening to emo rock thats made me bitter and morbid in the past few hours. i dunno emo lyrics just seem to have this deadly realism in that these things actually happen to people and people do go mad cut themselves,family,friends. its all part of life whether you like it or not. some people live with this, and some people dont.
not like many people actually read this.. but im just gonna go on anyway. sometimes you just loose hope in the world around you. you see no purpose of direction in your life. no meaning as to what you are doing. and even if there is a purpose its either futile or redundant. suddenly people turn on you. you learn and you move on. you learn the value of trust. you learn whos true to you. its not all happy around. dont pretend it is. then you have people who think this kind of mindset is for the weak and those that have negativity and no optimism. but its the harsh reality. im not complaining, just complying. and well whatever untruths are out there. you not gonna be able to change them. their carved into the flesh upon your forehead on display to all. so whats left to do? but put on a fake smile and let life swallow us whole. and this my friend(?) is what 4 hours of emo music can do to you. depressing no? "See You" by saves the day. My gut is burning. Won't you find me some water?Hey, just forget it can you bring me gasolineand collect a couple forks, hold them three feet apartand wait for lightning to strike to burn me up?Cause I don't think that I've got the stomach tostomach calling you today.My head is swirling. It's been carried off in the skyand where it lands is where is lands.So I guess that I will get another head and then get on with my lifeand leave you somewhere beneath the waves of time.And I'll wear glass shoes and plastic wrap.No, I'll just wear my insides.You want to know who I really am?Yeah so do I, yeah so do I.Cause I don't think that I've got the stomach tostomach calling you today.Right now I am turning off the lightscause I don't think that I've got the stomach tostomach calling you today.
James Barr at 10:44 AM
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